The day after Christmas is always kind of a bummer. I know for me, after almost a month of buying gifts and preparing, it can be kind of a let down for it to be over in less than 24 hours.
This year, I’m kind of relieved that we’re moving past that particular day. I really enjoyed the holiday season this year but toward the end it all got to be a bit too much. I started to stress out about how many presents Osita was going to get (I was worried about way too many, not too few), and what the day was going to do to her. Christmas Eve was kind of a shit show and even Monito seemed stretched past his limit by time we got home; bedtime that night consisted of 10 minutes of legitimate screaming–something he never does–before he finally conked out for the night. I forgot how intense loud screaming is, especially when it’s happening right in your ear.
So I’m not nearly as sad about the day being over as I usually am. In fact, I wonder if tomorrow will be just as wonderful as today, because tomorrow we get to actually PLAY with all those fun presents.
Mi.Vida worked until 3:30pm on Christmas Eve and has a regular work day again tomorrow. That is so strange for me and makes the whole holiday thing seem a little weird, frankly. Tomorrow I plan on staying home with kids, just letting Osita explore her new toys and maybe watching one of the movies she was gifted. For maybe the only day all break we’re just going to stay in and I’m actually looking forward to it (staying home with both kids usually makes me feel really claustrophobic, but after so many days of being out and about, I’m really ready to cocoon at home.)
I have a lot of posts brewing in my head and most of them are going to be hard to write. Things have been… well.. complicated is a word that comes to mind. Or better said, it feels complicated when I try to explain it. No word, or even set of words, seems to capture what these months have been like. There is also our wedding, which happens in ten days and for which I’m wholly unprepared. Thank GAWD we decided to only invite our immediate families. I’m SO THANKFUL for that choice now because honestly? I barely have it in me to pull off the very manageable ceremony we’re trying to put together.
So yeah, things are a bit difficult right now. Difficult to manage. Difficult to write about. But I do want to get it all out, to process it, so I hope to put some of these troubling thoughts “on paper” soon enough. With Osita home for the next week and a half–and not taking naps–it will be hard to get much writing done but I hope to make it happen if I can.
In the meantime I’ll reach out to each of you and say that I hope your holidays were happy. And if they weren’t, I hope they were at least bearable. And if they weren’t even that, I hope they didn’t leave very deep scars. I know this season can be very difficult for so many people; I thought of this community as I counted my blessings these past days. I know many of you didn’t feel all that blessed this holiday season and that’s a hard place to be.