1 . 4 . 14

I don’t think I ever told you guys that Mi.Vida and I are officially getting married; we actually set a date! We will be officially tying the knot on January 4th, 2014. It will be a very small ceremony. Only our immediate families will be there, my sister and her boyfriend and Ben’s friend and his girlfriend (his sister won’t be able to come because she is teaching in Kazakhstan next year and won’t be coming home for the holidays). Our very good friend (the guy who introduced us) will be officiating the wedding and of course, our children will be there. I suppose Teo will be our ring bearer and Isa will be our flower girl. There are so few people attending that I suppose we could have it at my parents’ house, which is quite big and very nice.

I’m pretty excited about the whole thing, even though it will be very small. We’ve waited a long time for this and I think it will be a special day, even though it’s not what I once dreamed of for my wedding–I suppose none of the me-getting-married stuff has gone according to my original plans so it makes sense that this won’t either. And honestly, I think this is the best thing for us, especially at this time.

In January Teo will barely be 2.5 months old and I’ll be about to return to work. It’s not really the best time to have anything bigger than what we’re planning. Then why early January? You may ask. Well our original domestic partnership ceremony was on January 2nd and we wanted something close to that so that our anniversary would be around the same time. Also, I love the numerology of that date, I think 1.4.14 is pretty awesome. I’m excited to finally be married to the father of my children.

We do want to have a big party at some point but I don’t think I’ll be able to for a while after Teo is born, so summer it will have to be. I’m sure it will be worth the wait, whatever we end up doing.

So those are our plans. I guess I’m officially engaged! I actually changed my relationship status on Facebook a week or so again, which I know is silly because Mi.Vida never actually proposed, I don’t have a rock on my finger and it’s silly to say that I’m engaged, but honestly, I’ve missed out on so much of the tradition surrounding married, I’m trying to participate in the small ways I can.

When and how did you get engaged? When and how did you get married? Did you have the wedding of your dreams?

16 responses

  1. Congratulations! My hubby proposed to me in the Miami Airport parking garage. He was stationed in FL, so I went down to visit him. Our wedding ceremony was small (13 guests), no attendants and held at my mom’s and step-dad’s cottage. So, I can honestly say that I got married on a beach! We had our reception that evening, where we invited all friends and family. I don’t know that it was the wedding of my dreams–as a child I never thought about my dream wedding. What I know is that it was a beautiful day, I felt like a princess and it was wonderful.

  2. Congrats! My hubby and I had a civil ceremony a little over a year before our actual wedding, and it was in many ways jut as romantic as our actual wedding day (if a bit less festive as we both went in to work afterward). I think it is the person u r with – or in your case the people – that make the day special, and your day will be just beautiful. All the best to you guys, and make sure to post some photos!

  3. Congrats to you and Mi Vida! My husband proposed while visiting NYC, in Central Park. He was (as is his custom) awkward. It was cute. I was somewhat (but not completely) surprised–we’d gone to look at rings a few weeks back. He couldn’t afford the engagement ring, so bought me a plain band. I will admit, when the ring never materialized several weeks later, I threw a hissy…one of my most shameful moments. You see, I wanted the whole “show off the ring and get oohed and aahed over” moment. Blech. We got married about a year later, in my hometown, in a traditional ceremony as per our cultural background. It was “big” in terms of lots of guests, but otherwise quite simple in terms of decor/food/etc… I suppose it was similar to what I’d dreamed of, except the stress involved with family/etc… planning a big shindig was obviously not part of my fantasy.

  4. Awh, that is so exciting! I love the numerology of that date as well 🙂 My wedding was on 7/19/08, for no reason other than the June date I wanted was too close to my BFF’s EDD, and I wanted her to be able to make the 1,100 mile trip (which she did with an 8w old & 2 year old – a feat I am more impressed with every day!).

    After about 3 yrs of dating, Charlie proposed to me with a Scrabble board (we used to play a lot, and when I got home from work one Friday, he had written “Will U Marry Me” on the board!). We got married the following summer on the side of the mountain that surrounds our town – it was truly awesome. Not the traditional Church wedding in MN I had envisioned (where everyone in my family gets married), but awesome nonetheless.

  5. Congrats!! Thats wonderful. While the proposal was a bit disappointing (“uhh, so we’ve been together for a while, do you think you want to get married?”), the wedding was amazing. We rented out a historic lodge for our entire family over Labor Day Weekend. It was memorable in all the right ways. I’m sure your wedding will be just as memorable!

  6. I’m so excited for you! Congrats!

    K proposed to me in Washington, DC. He’s a history teacher so we walked around to all the monuments and he told me all the history behind it all. Then on our way to another monument he stopped on the sidewalk and asked me if I knew what special thing happened in that spot. I said I didn’t know and then he got down on one knee. He proposed and I said yes! We got married on a beach in Florida in 2007. I never imagined a beach wedding but I loved it. It was my perfect wedding even though it wasn’t what I thought I wanted.

  7. There was no one moment when we got engaged, just a lot of conversations and planning and logistics. I felt frustrated that I didn’t really get to enjoy the moment because there were so many details to work out. The wedding itself was wonderful, though. We had to get married quickly because of k’s visa, so we got married in my parents’ backyard. We had an African band, and my college roommate made the wedding cake. The florist was the mom of a friend from elementary school, the photographer was a friend of my mom’s…made it all very personal. There were about 75 people, mostly my side, but K’s aunt & cousins flew in from CA and that was nice.

  8. Congratulations, and I think the date is perfect. Our anniversary is 12/01/01 and like you, we loved the symmetry of the numbers. We got engaged about 2 weeks after Valentine’s Day in 2000 and had a fairly traditional Christmas wedding in 2001.

  9. Congratulations! We were engaged in Spain, on Monte Urgul in San Sebastian. And got married the following June. It was a smallish wedding, on a mountain in Princeton Massachussetts. Harbinger of things to come, I guess!

  10. Our engagement was pretty mutual–we’d gone out to dinner at a nice restaurant to celebrate something else, and the subject came up, and we basically looked at each other said, “should we really do this??” and we both agreed that we should.
    The wedding itself was really fun. Some friends of ours officiated, and we had put a lot of thought into the ceremony itself and what we wanted to say. We had the ceremony at the UU church where we first met, and had about 100 friends/family present. And the reception was fairly simple and held at a state park. We were supposed to be able to go swimming there, but the beach was closed (due to some sort of contamination!). But Roo’s uncle saved the day by getting a Slip and Slide! We all had lots of fun on it.
    That wedding was in 2006, and it feels like our “real” wedding–but it wasn’t legal. When our state finally approved same-sex marriage, we had a simple courthouse ceremony with just our parents and son in attendance on the anniversary of our first wedding. The second wedding was also fun, but felt like just a formality–I even went back to work that afternoon.
    Neither wedding was the kind that you see in the magazines, but they felt right for us.

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