Sorry I stepped away so abruptly and so completely. I found myself totally unable to proces the horrible tragedy that so thoroughly transformed the nation a week ago today.
I still find myself at a loss. There are truly no words.
I am in a very dark place, one that even the light of this space can’t penetrate. I will probably not be writing her much in the days and weeks to come.
But life moves on and so, I suppose, must I, even when I have no idea how to manage it.
And now, for the purpose of this post, which is to ask the IF veterans out there if they can help me.
It is CD1 and I was finally able to schedule my HSG. Because it could not be scheduled until CD12 I must take six days of BCP, to ensure I don’t ovulate before/during the procedure. I must admit, I am very wary of taking six days of BCP–what will it do to my cycle? How will my body regulate itself again after that kind of strange, stunted suppression?
Ideally I’d be getting the HSG done on CD5 or 6, long before ovulation might happen but with Kaiser it seems that will be very hard to manage and if I take this appointment I can get it done when both Mi.Vida and I are off work (Happy New Years Eve to me) so we don’t have to waste precious sick days on it. It seems that is the clincher, so BCPs it is.
I was hoping someone would have some experience or insight with a situation like this. What can I expect after suppressing ovulation but then ending that suppression right when ovulation would have occurred? What will that cycle look like? (I know I won’t be trying that cycle.) Will this mess me up for a few cycles or will my body regulate itself easily? While acupuncture has done nothing to get me pregnant, it has made my cycles quite regular and I’d hate to throw the considerable time and money invested down the toilet for this procedure.
I know it’s stupid to be obsessing over dumb stuff like this when people’s lives have been cut short, when people’s lives have been shattered. I know my quest for a second child is a luxury that those whose lives were taken will never get to pursue. But right now, it’s all I have to get me through the days, the weeks, the months. To get me through tomorrow. It’s the only way I know to glean meaning from anything right now.
So, despite how inappropriate it feels to be thinking about all this now, any experience or insight into this would be much appreciated.
Happy holidays to you all.