Thank you

Today, as you can imagine, was a tough day. I spent most of the morning grieving–which I did in spades–and by the afternoon I had migrated almost completely into the angry stage. I’ll write more about that in a couple days.

Yes, yesterday morning I was a sniveling, pathetic mess. Luckily a few people intervened in key moments to get me through the day.

First a kind coworker spotted my sadness and pulled me out of a meeting to take an impromptu walk. She let me explain why I was so bummed out (and wasn’t even upset by my crying), totally validating all my feelings and never once saying something trite or offering assvice. She was amazing.

Later my one good friend at work took me to lunch and we talked our cute two year olds and how much IF sucks (she struggled for ten years before adopting her son from Korea). She too listened and understood without uttering an insensitive word.

That afternoon I had a nice gchat with a far-away girlfriend who asked how our struggle was going and listened to me vent about all we had been through and all that lay ahead.

All day Mi.Vida popped up, offering love and support via text, gchat or email. This evening we got my favorite Chinese food and made time for not one, but TWO episodes of Homeland (G-ddamn that show is good).

Oh, and how could I almost forgot? The first smile of the day was coaxed by my BFF Jjiraffe who sent me an email outlining all the ways in which I don’t suck and so therefore am awesome. Oh, and she texted me a million times a day (like she does every day) assuring me that everything I was feeling was perfectly understandable and commiserating with me every step of the way. (Seriously, I’d be in a mental institution without that woman, I swear to G-d).

And of course, each and every one of your wonderful comments propped me up when I could barely get my head out of my hands.

So yeah. It was a hard day but one sprinkled with wonderful moments, moments that made the day so much more bearable. And for that I am eternally grateful.

I hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving. I’ll be thinking of all of you for whom this holiday is a bitter reminder of what you don’t yet have. Together, we can get through this.

8 responses

  1. Sometimes a terrible thing can remind us of all that we do have — this post helped me remember all the wonderful people I know who care about me, just like you have all those wonderful people who care about you. Happy holiday!

  2. I’m so glad that you had support in spades when you really needed it. It’s amazing the effect of unmitigated, unqualified, sensitive understanding can have.

  3. I’ve had very little computer access lately, so I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to send you some support yesterday. I am glad there were so many others there for you, though. And I’m sorry the news you got was what it was.

  4. It is so wonderful that you have some gals at work you can talk to about this. THAT HELPS SO MUCH! What a relief on those days that you just need to talk about it.

    Have a great holiday as you look forward to Tuesday’s class.

  5. I’m so glad you have so many good people around you. It’s terribly hard in the midst of all this to remember that we are so much more than just our reproductive systems. Hugs.

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