Thank Goodness It’s Friday

I didn’t want to write TGIF because I feel like that has connotations of drinking margaritas or beers after work and I certainly won’t be doing any of that. What I will be doing is going to acupuncture and then a Warriors game for my good friend’s birthday. It should be fun, but I’m going to be exhausted.

I’m going to be exhausted because I did not sleep well last night. First of all, I went to bed late because I didn’t do yin yoga until after my late therapy appointment, plus I was getting in a load of laundry that I needed for the Warriors game this afternoon. So I didn’t go to bed until 11pm, which is way past my bedtime and then I woke up when Mi.Vida came home from his concert. And then I woke up about ten more times when Mi.Vida would do this horrible snoring thing where he’d stop breathing and then have this massive, booming snore when he started breathing again. For some reason I didn’t think to ask him to turn over until well into the morning so I did not get much sleep at all. And the first thing I did when I woke up this morning was bark at him about it. I immediately felt horrible for doing that.

Anyway, therapy last night was really good. I didn’t realize how much some stuff was bothering me until I was crying about it to my therapist. But by the end of the hour I did feel considerably better and pretty proud of how well I’ve been handling everything. I did talk a lot about how I don’t feel much like myself right now. There are times when I get in a place where I absolutely don’t recognize myself at all. Like yesterday I came home and tried to take a nap. But laying there I quickly realized that I was hungry, which was making me feel sick, and I just couldn’t ignore it at all (this can be more upsetting than you might realize). So before I knew it I was boiling water for noodles while I chopped strawberries for a smoothie. Five minutes later I was eating the noodles ravenously (with just olive oil and salt I might add) while watching my smoothie in the blender. Fast forward another 5 minutes and I was chugging the smoothie between bites of pasta while gchatting with my friend about how I don’t even recognize myself anymore. It was all very disconcerting. And you might think (as my friend did) that noodles and a smoothie is not that weird, and I would concur. It’s not what I did, but more how I did it that bothered me. I really felt like I was being taken over by something much bigger than myself.

After all that I did take my nap, and it was timed nicely because Mi.Vida woke me up with “smooches” as I had requested earlier in the day. But I have to say, when I take these naps I’m out of commission for 30 or so minutes after I wake up because I’m still so tired I feel almost sick. It used to be I woke up after a 30, maybe 45 minute nap feeling pretty refreshed. Now I have to be awoken from an hour+ nap (I’ve easily slept past 2 hours) and I don’t feel refreshed at all. Again, I do not feel like myself lately.

Anyway, after my nap Mi.Vida and I just hung out before he headed to a concert and I went to therapy.

When I got home I immediately put in some laundry and then swept the floors so I could put down my yoga mat. I did an hour of yin yoga and it felt amazing. I could absolutely feel my energy moving more freely through my body. Before I went to bed I cleaned the bathroom because suddenly I could see how absolutely disgusting it was and we have a guest coming up for the football game tomorrow. Hence I did not crawl into bed until 11pm.

Today I feel so tired I almost feel sick. I have absolutely no interest in being at school. I can’t eat lunch with my staff because my advisory class gets their pizza lunch today, a reward for selling the most magazines in the 5th grade earlier this year. This means my classroom will be trashed by the time the bell rings for 5th period. I have to run right over to acupuncture so I can run right downtown when I get home to grab dinner with Mi.Vida before we BART over to the East Bay for the Warriors game. My big plan is to sleep on the BART and hopefully that will get me through the game and then back home again.

Tomorrow is a later afternoon football game and Sunday is grad school work, grading papers and cleaning house. Man oh man, all I want to do is sleep until Monday…

BUENAS NOTICIAS – Yesterday a woman who is an aid for one of our 5th grade students guessed that I was pregnant and I didn’t deny it. It was fun to tell someone and share my experience with them. Today she showed up with a bag of “goodies” for me: a 12 pack of Ginger Ale, Saltines and Mini-Saltines. I thought that was very sweet of her.

~ by Esperanza on November 6, 2009.